Oh sure, I knew some of them probably went on Youtube and used my movie, lingerie and underwear commercial for spank bait, but I didn't give a fuck. It's a free goddam country. If some no account loser with a beer belly and a bald head wanted to beat off while he watched a woman he'd never have a hope in Hell of laying, what did I care? I mean, yeah, I got my share of weirdo letters and presents, every gal in this business does, but my agency was pretty good at weaning out the nutjobs. I even got a few lesbians writing to me about how they like to rub one out while watching my movie. Again, I didn't care. I got a few pics, and man, let me tell ya, it's always the ugliest fans that send the pics. What, did these losers think I would take one look at them and just fall madly in love? Please.
Not that I didn't have my share of guys. This business, I had my pick of hot dudes who would line up just to catch a glimpse of my tits. I had my type-long dark hair, green eyes, athletic build, and good...equipment. I also loved the fellas who could keep me in blow. If there's a model out there who claims she's never used the magic white snow, she's either a goddam saint or the biggest liar in the world. We all used it. It was a way of relaxing after hours and hours under the brutal hot lights. I tell ya, I could be tense as all hell from a hard day's work, but one sniff of that nose candy, and everything was roses.
Anyway, to cut a long bore short, I was the fucking queen of my own little world. Then one day when I'm making an appearance at some podunk fair and trying not to die of fucking boredom, this little Suzy Corncob comes up to me. She's got the mousiest brown hair I ever saw, a face that looks like about seventy miles of bad road, and she must have weighed three hundred if she weighed an ounce. Smelled like a pile of manure, too. I'm trying my best not to gag at this ugly ass bitch. She gives me a smile that makes me think of a crooked fence, and sticks out a hand that looks like it has never seen a washcloth. "Hi, " she says in a fucking grating Southern accent, "I'm Sandra and I want to be a model someday."
Well, I just stared at her for about five minutes before busting out laughing. Told her it would take a fucking miracle before an ugly ass troll like her would even come within spitting distance of being half way decent looking. Bitch started crying, giving me this "Oh, how could you be so mean" look. Like I cared.
Then she stops crying and gets this weird gleam in her little piggy eyes. She stares at me, and I'm starting to feel really freaked out. "You're ugly," she says to me. "You're the ugliest person I ever met. People don't know how ugly you are, because you hide behind a mask of beauty. I wonder how you really look."
By now, I am officially done with this crazy asshole. I told her get the fuck away from me before I called the cops. She just gave me that picket fence smile and set a round object on the table, then turned and walked off.
I picked the thing up with my fingertips, not wanting to get too much of her grease on me. It turned out to be a mirror. I look at myself, admiring how much better I am than everyone at Podunk State Fair, when the glass starts to shimmer. It was like throwing pebbles in a pond and watching the water ripple.
The glass solidified, and...what I saw looking back made me scream. It was..god, even now the doctors can't find a way to describe what I look like. It was every horrible, nightmarish vision come to life. And it wasn't just my face, either. It was all of me. I had become...ugly.
But I think I know how to make myself beautiful again. I've been thinking about it a lot, and that girl-Sandra-she did something to me. Stole my body, and did some weird ass mumbo jumbo with the mirror. I still have it. I figured all I had to do was find someone beautiful, and then everything would be back to normal. I could go back to being me. So that's where you come in.
Now you know my story. All I'm asking is that you just look at me. That's all.
Just one look.
Please.